I am slack, I still have to link in the pictures, it will happen someday.
Day 2:
I awoke and had to pee so bad it got me out of the warm bag. I laid back down and gathered my riding clothes and shoved them to the bottom of my bag. Once they were warm I suited up and started talking smack to Joe. He said there was NO WAY I could get him to come out of the tent. Ultimately I had to pull the “Son” card on him and he would later tell me he couldn’t believe I said “Logan wouldn’t be proud of his dad if he stayed in bed instead of finishing the race.” It was harsh but it had to be done.
I was terrified to change my front tube in the cold but the thought of pumping it up all day wasn’t exciting either. So I got out of the bag, turned on my stove, drank PBR and heated up ravioli and mac N Cheese together. It was a breakfast of champions and during the cooking and drinking I was able to swap the tube.
We made it to the start 6:15 AM on time and avoided my greatest fear, getting yelled at for being late two years in a row.
The second day started with the climb we all foresaw, Pilot Mountain Hell ooops I mean road. We took our sweet time with team Smoke Bikes, Beth and Ian at the Fish Hatchery as we all cussed Erinna for telling us the bathrooms were open even though we all knew better.
After chatting for a bit, we started the easy climb that would take us to Gloucester. Our ultimate route for day two would be as follows:
White Pines -> 477 -> 276 -> 475 -> Pilot Mountain Road -> Art Loeb -> BRP -> Black Basalm Road -> Ivestor Gap (mandatory checkpoint 1) -> BRP -> **HIKE Seinerd Ridge -> 225 -> Daniel Ridge (checkpoint 2) -> 475 -> Davidson River Trail -> 276 -> Coontree -> Bennett Gap (Checkpoint 3) -> 477 -> Finish
Once I made it to Gloucester, there were a bunch of teams there hanging out. I chatted with Cook for a long time while we feasted on goldfish Cook had brought. Eventually my new partner Nancy showed up at the gap. Cook offered him some goldfish, he took some and ate them dropping some on the ground. Cook and I immediately started picking the dropped fish off of the ground and ate them. There is no wasting in DD.
Cook, Nancy and I all took off up Pilot Mountain Road. Cook and I chatted for a good 1/3 of the climb until I eventually decided to stop and relieve myself. There was no reason to push things as Nancy was not having a good day.
At the top of Pilot Mountain Road I had time to drink a beer, eat some brownies, watch Cook and Cissy take off, chatted up GatorBack and generally just got cold waiting for Nancy. I told Erinna NOT to tell Nancy where we were headed as I knew that’s when the breakdown would start.
Apparently Joe decided to show up for a minute because once he was there he immediately asked “Where is the mandatory.” I told him Ivestor would be a lavish land to see on such a fine day and luckily Nancy stayed away for awhile.
Heading toward Art Loeb and Farlow I saw team Smoke coming toward me and I thought to myself “They are fast!” When I said “What are you doing.” They replied “What are you doing?” I said “headed to Art Loeb. . . “ Luckily I am not the only one who loses my navigational mind whilst Pisgah Productioning.
We hiked Art Loeb, flip flopping back and forth with Team Smoke. I was jealous of their lightweight rigs as we hiked. Here is what awaited us at the top:
We quickly made our way to Ivestor and saw Mike Brown manning the checkpoint. I had seen the Beer Fairy again at Black Basalm so I was now in Heaven. Joe again shotgunned one beer and I hit the other two following it up with my Highlands Whit I hijacked at Black Basalm while staring at the map.
All of the sudden, out of nowhere Nancy came running out of Shining Rock wilderness and pushed Joe off of the world. CRRRAAAPPP, now I had to deal with Nancy’s bitching again. Nancy wanted to go from Ivestor down BRP to 276 and ride the pavement all the way back to camp. WHAT we climbed all that way to ride the pavement back? I couldn’t let her talk to me like that so I worked up a compromise that would nab us two checkpoints on the way back with minimal climbing.
We hiked down Seinerd Ridge (luckily I had hiked up it earlier in the year or there would be virtually no way of finding the trail head as there is no sign) and hit 225. I had forgotten how much climbing there is on 225 to get to Daniel but it was totally worth it as it spit us out right at the top of the singletrack and we finally got to ride some trail.
After nabbing our second checkpoint, Nancy’s fury almost overwhelmed me. I didn’t have to physically harm her but I did have to say “Shut the fuck up and ride your bike” at one point. Luckily I was so far ahead of her going up Coontree I didn’t have to listen to the moaning. Our third checkpoint in the bag we were the third team to come in for the day. We finished with a respectable 11 checkpoints and we can now call ourselves Double Dare finishers.
Next up, THE MOST HORRIBLE THING EVER!
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4 comments:
Easily one of the best posts you've ever had. You'll be happy to note that Nancy showed up at work on Monday, too. Joe was back on Tuesday.
BB
Mater,
Help yourself to the fire-sleeping shot...sums up day 1 nicely. word.
-mike r
Start a new tv campaign. "Got a little Nancy in ya"
well done sir. You always know those little shortcuts to nab stuff easily on the way out. I went back and rode Squirrel today. I can say that i'd rather ride it in dry pitch blackness then after a full day of rain and fresh leaves....what a bumblefuck 3 hour tour (think giligan)
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